The Focus on Meaning over Goals. And Why I don't always put Bows on Gifts
Brett Farrell
I recently spoke with a friend after he finished his big race of the year. He shared something I know to be pretty common for runners after a big event we’ve poured ourselves into:
He had the post-race blues.
It makes sense when you think about it. You hold this goal for months—sometimes years—and you put in the time, the mental energy, the physical effort.
It’s a lot. I’ll get to the bows and gifts shortly.
I remember a long stretch in my life when I fixated on the New York City Marathon. For years, I dreamt about the course, running through the boroughs, and I consumed everything I could about the marathon. I built a world in my head where crossing that finish line would somehow make me better.
Then I finally did it. And it was incredible. One of the most memorable runs of my life.
And then, in the days after, I felt empty.
That’s the thing about goals. They’re a temporary chapter. They can motivate the heck out of us and give us direction and focus.
Until they end.
Then we’re left floundering, not totally sure where to turn next.
And what do most of us do at that moment? We sign up for another race.
Let’s start this party over again.
Awesome. Well… kind of.
It becomes the pattern. I’m not knocking the pattern—I’m just wondering whether it’s bringing the most fulfillment to our lives. Is there a better alternative to constant goal-chasing?
I’m not here to answer that for anyone, but I do want to pose the question: what feels meaningful?
Goal chasing or aimless meandering?
When I put it like that, goal chasing sounds great—obviously—but hang on for a second.
What if there’s beauty in the meandering? In the simplicity of moving for movement’s sake. Because when we first started running, it was the act itself that stole our hearts. Not the need for a finish line.
Yes, we’ve all heard it: it’s not the destination, it’s the journey.
I’d never tell someone not to run their dream race or adventure since there is so much good stuff in there. But I would suggest trying to pull more meaning from the daily miles too.
Because that’s what life is full of.
The race moments are tiny drops in the life-bucket compared to all those days we get up at 5am to squeeze in a run.
The way I see it, the finish line is a nice bonus. It’s the bow on the gift. And inside that pretty wrapped box are hundreds of miles, wandering thoughts, the sounds of the forest, beautiful views, powerful conversations with running buddies, and a quieter mind.
And when we focus too much on the bow, we miss what’s actually inside the gift.
The true beauty of running—the gift we can access anytime.
Now, I’m going to go wrap some gifts… and then go meandering.
Happy Holidays!
1 comment
Very thoughtful. Thank you for always giving perspective. I have really enjoyed my buddy runs this week. It’s such a great way to share time with my friends.